Elitist Book Reviews

Nick "Slamel" Dianatkah is a co-founder of EBR.

Favorite Authors: R. Scott Bakker, Joe Abercrombie, Scott Lynch, George R. R. Martin, J.V. Jones

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Ayn - Ayn is our really good friend Rob. Rob has a way with words that few people we know (and we know a LOT) are able to employ. He is passionate about his reading and writing and therefore was a perfect fit for our team.

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Fellfrosch - You know him as Dan Wells, the author of some of our favorite novels, I AM NOT A SERIAL KILLER, MR. MONSTER, and I DON'T WANT TO KILL YOU. In our midst, we affectionately call him Dan the Jerk-face, or Dan the Cylon. Check out his site at http://www.fearfulsymmetry.net/

Steve is your typical reader of books who loves to tell you what is good and, more importantly, what he hates. He grew up reading Lloyd Alexander, J.R.R. Tolkien, and Terry Brooks. Then he got a job at a Waldenbooks. In addition to improving his literary tastes, he was soon doing a lot of the managing duties there, and helped that particular store become the Numero Uno ranked store in the country. It was during this time that he decided his taste in books was better than everyone else’s (duh), and his customers/friends/family agreed.

Steve is the Editor of Elitist Book Reviews.

Favorite Authors: Steven Erikson, Tom Lloyd, Jonathan Maberry, Brian Lumley, Joe Abercrombie, James Barclay, Chris Wooding, Sarah Pinborough

Steve is an aspiring author himself. If you'd like to check out his published works, you can buy them here (they are awesome! Honest!):

"Fear" - Contained in THIS ANTHOLOGY WAS WRITTEN IN AN HOUR.
"Still Life" - Contained in THE CRIMSON PACT: VOL 2. If you want an in-depth look at the thought process (or lack thereof) behind the story, pick up the Special Edition of the Crimson Pact: Vol 2.
"Son of Fire, Son of Thunder" - Co-written by Larry Correia. Contained in THE CRIMSON PACT: VOL 2. If you want an in-depth look at the thought process (or lack thereof) behind the story, pick up the Special Edition of the Crimson Pact: Vol 2.
"That Which We Fear" - Co-written with Larry Correia. Contained in THE CRIMSON PACT: VOL 3.
"The Best Lies" - Contained in THE CRIMSON PACT: VOL 4.

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Here is a central location for all of the courses in the Fantasy genre.

FANTASY 101: An introductory course on a few choices for books to enter the genre. We disagree on the best approach, but that works out better for you since you get two different, but equally viable options.

FANTASY 102: A very brief selection of other subgenres in the Fantasy section of speculative fiction. We recommend a number of YA, Steampunk, or Urban Fantasy here.

FANTASY 201: 6 books that we think you should absolutely read to further your fantasy book education. And what we think is law.

FANTASY 202: Primarily a step into the Horror genre, and a small explanation of what exactly the horror part of the fantasy genre is.

FANTASY 301: This is where the learning curve jumps, but where the reward is the greatest. These are our favorite books in the genre. Period.

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Here are our listings for our courses in the subject of Science Fiction:

SCIENCE FICTION 101: Hey, everyone has to start somewhere right? Even the most anti-SF people will have a shot of enjoying these entry level novels.

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ELITIST CLASSICS
Elitist Classics--Part 1: The Fantasy genre owes a debt to these authors and works. 6 influential picks that paved the road for today's works.

Elitist Classics--Part 2: Mystery & Horror are far more important than anyone cares to admit. Just look at these authors!

Elitist Classics--Part 3: Science Fiction & Steampunk. Imagining the future, that is what these literary giants did. Classics one and all.

Welcome to Elitist Book Reviews

So who are we?

Just a couple of people with much better taste in books than you.

So, we figured since all our friends, our family, our acquaintances, and even random strangers in bookstores (including, sadly, the employees of the bookstores) come to us for book advice, that we may as well give this kind of advice on a psuedo-professional level.

We post reviews primarily for Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror, and Mystery novels, but really we read whatever the heck we want. Our reviews will be posted during the week, with the weekends as our time to relax.

We hope you enjoy the spoiler-free reviews, and we will do our best to best to tell you what books to either avoid, borrow, or buy. You should do exactly what we say.

Seriously.

And in case you are wondering, we will be brutal, and we will be mean if we don’t like the book. That’s part of the fun isn’t it?

Because we know you are dying to talk to us. Literally.

If you have been mulling over a book for a while now, and you just don't know if you should spend your hard-earned moolah, shoot us an email. Chances are we have either read it already, own it, or have been wondering about that title ourselves. If the book looks like it sucks too much, and we can't even get close to it without vomiting a little, we'll try to get a guest-reviewer.

Note: We don't review self-published stuff 99.999% of the time. We just don't have the time. Between our actual jobs and the hundreds of books we get from the major publishers, we just can't.

Contact us at elitistbookreviews@gmail.com

Vanessa-Vanessa is the mother of three young children, so not only is it impossible to surprise her, it also takes some considerable antics to impress her (EBR is on the right track, but it remains to be seen...). She's raising up her brood right, though, because the next generation of geeks cannot be trained on Star Wars alone.

Favorite Authors: Lois McMaster Bujold, Robin McKinley, Patricia Briggs, Jim Butcher, Robert Jordan, Judith Merkle Riley

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Dan-Currently a graduate student in the esoteric art of rocket science simulation, he spends his days beating his computer to a pulp and/or gnashing his teeth through copious mounds of technical publications. Nights are split between more of the same (glutton for punishment, this one) or writing his own fantasy fiction. He never sleeps. Father of three perfect children that all want to grow up to be just like him: tall, smart, and good-looking. Reading awesome books fills his down time, with a focus on those that are well-written works of old and new masters. He has little patience for poor writing and plots that don't grab by the throat, the heart, or the funny bone. When found in public, he will usually be seen weaving through masses of people with his face nose-deep into the most recent book. Yes, he's that good.

Favorite Authors: KJ Parker, Daniel Abraham, R. Scott Bakker, Joe Abercrombie, Steven Erikson, Robert Jordan

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Shawn-Shawn is an avid reader as well as a concept artist for a video game company making him instantly the coolest guy you have ever met, or even read about (well, except the main EBR guys...yes, we still edit here). He is a voracious reader of anything he can get his hands on, and has the immediate knack of knowing if a book is good or not when he reads it. Those close friends of his often reserve judgment on books they have read until they hear what Shawn tells them what they should think. He is extremely attractive and often has to fend off women and small woodland creatures that follow him around.

Favorite Authors: Vernor Vinge, Cathrynne M. Valente, China Miéville, Daniel Abraham, James S.A. Corey

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Bryce-Bryce Moore is an author, librarian, and a big fan of YA (although he tends to read pretty broadly: everything from Science Fiction to Thrillers to Fantasy to mainstream lit--pretty much whatever he feels like reading at the moment). In addition to being a full-fledged book geek, he's also a film geek (don't get him started talking about adaptation theory), board game geek, video game aficionado, and tech junkie. He blogs every weekday over at http://brycesramblings.blogspot.com/. To find out more about his writing and books, check out his website: http://brycemoore.com/.

Favorite Authors: Terry Pratchett, Stephen King, Garth Nix, CS Lewis, Neal Stephenson, Orson Scott Card

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Nick Sharps - Nick Sharps is an Advertising Major and book connoisseur. His private library is in a state of constant flux as he lends books to his ungrateful friends who rarely return them. He is also a music and video game enthusiast though literature remains his one true love. Nick is frequently labeled a critic by his family and peers, making Elitist Book Reviews the perfect place to voice his brutally honest opinion.

Favorite Authors: John Ringo, Larry Correia, Joe Abercrombie, Dan Abnett